By: Kelbek Avarice
Rule #2: Never Split The Party!
The monsters have divine intuition, and know when the party is weakened.
Rule #3: The Dice Choose You.
They have a mind of their own…
Rule #4: The Bartender Knows Everything.
He is the prophet of the world, and has the knowledge of the universe.
Rule #5: Copper Is The Enemy.
One hundred copper equals one gold. You do the math.
Rule #6: Go With The Flow.
Unless the flow leads to a giant waterfall.
Rule #7: You Can Never Have Too Many Minions.
One hundred enemies? All I see is free experience!
Rule #8: Take Chances.
Just not reckless ones.
Rule #9: Don’t Act Reckless.
But take chances.
Rule #10: If the GM Forgets Something, Let Him/her Know.
You might get extra experience!
Rule #11: Don’t Expect The Unexpected, Become The Unexpected.
Make the GM improvise for your amusement.
Rule #12: Escape From Reality.
And enter a better one.
Rule #13: Train In Heal.
It’ll save your life.
Rule #14: There Are No Such Things As Friends, Only Allies.
It makes it easier to kill them.
Rule #15: Be Creative!
It’s half the game.
Rule #16: Don’t Trust The Sexy Lady Sitting At The Bar Alone.
There’s an extremely high chance that she’ll end up killing you.
Rule #17: The d20 Can Either Be Your Best Friend, Or Your Worst Enemy.
So treat them with kindness.
Rule #18: Leave Your Personal Problems Out Of The Game.
Nobody cares that you had a fight with your girlfriend. Be happy you have one.
Rule #19: Stay In Character.
It’s a lot easier and more fun for everyone.
Rule #20: Don’t Blindly Jump Into Dark Pits.
Especially without rope.
Rule #21: If The Reward Is Outrageously High, You Won’t Be Getting It.
Because you’re really going to get 2,000 gold for investigating a “rat infestation”.
Rule #22: Try Out Various Characters.
Just not bullywugs.
Rule #23: If You Aren’t Sure About Something, Ask The GM.
After all, the GM is God.
Rule #24: Try Your Best Not To Burn Down A Town.
Especially one full of little hobbits.
Rule #25: You Can’t Carry A Great Axe, Two Long Swords, And A Flail On Your Back.
They only thing you’ll accomplish is a broken back.
Rule #26: When Entering A Town, Go Immediately To The Alchemist Shop.
If you’re lucky enough to find one.
Rule #28: You Can Never Have Too Much Gold.
But platinum is better.
Rule #29: Save Your Dailies.
Better safe then sorry.
Rule #30: The Final Boss Isn’t Always The Final Boss.
So save your dailies.
Rule #31: You Never Need To Go To The Bathroom.
Convenient, isn’t it?
Rule #32: If You Don’t Know What A Beholder Is, You’re Lucky.
And if you do know, then I sincerely apologize.
Rule #33: Check For Traps.
They can be in doors, chests, walls, almost anywhere.
Rule #34: Bring A Random Item.
You never know when you’ll need to kick out the ol’ dowsing rod.
Rule #35: Don’t Bang Pots And Pans Together To Attract Enemies.
Unless you’re into that sort of thing.
Rule #36: Don’t Trust Random NPC’s.
You shouldn’t even consider them allies.
Rule #37: You Can Never Have Too Many Magic Items.
Is there something wrong with having boots of speed, gauntlets of strength, a ring of teleportation, and a necklace of invisibility? I didn’t think so.
Rule #38: Contrary To The Name, You Aren’t Always In Dungeons, And You Don’t Always Fight Dragons.
Mind blowing, isn’t it?
Rule #39: Stay Away From Graveyards.
You’ll thank me later… if you still have a brain.
Rule #40: Learn To Improvise!
If needed, take classes.
Rule #41: You Always Wear The Same Clothes.
And never shower…
Rule #42: Play Smart.
Just don’t be smarter than the GM.
Rule #43: Stay Away From Giant Talking Skulls.
They cause nothing but trouble!
Rule #44: Always Carry A Thievery Kit.
You’d be surprised at how many things are locked nowadays.
Rule #45: Explore Every Corner Of The Dungeon.
You just might find something worthwhile.
Rule #46: Don’t Underestimate Fire.
So be sure to carry plenty of H2O.
Rule #47: Know Your Character Types.
I.e.: Controller, Striker, Leader, Defender.
Rule #48: Don’t Have Your Character Wear Big Hoop Earrings.
This isn’t a beauty contest.
Rule #49: There’s No Difference Between Diplomacy And Intimidation As Long As It Gets The Job Done.
But an axe to the head leaves a better impression.
Rule #50: Make Your Mark In History!
Let the world know your name!